Trying Hard to Understand

I'm struggling to understand
I think I'm failing
To understand
Your situation
My importance

If it was me
I'd die to let you know
To let you understand
To let you in

But I guess you are not me
You are you
This is your way
Your decision
Your jurisdiction

It bites me and my ego

I'm hoping otherwise

It couldve been handled better
But like I said
It's all you
And none of me

I'm biting my tongue to not  say a word
Or I'll come off self-centered
I'm not the King of You
or Kind of anything

Silence is my best weapon
Against you and against myself

I bet my life on me winning

intensifying My Prayers

Hmm...

I think that the 2nd of October is da bomb and it's very hard to top that up.

Sorry but thats just what I though and I had a feeling that you'd feel the same.

Ok changing topics, right now I'm kinda okay of not seeing you for a bit. I guess I kinda grew up..

haha ok tknak berlagak nnt nangis

I'm in the process of doubling and meng-intensify my prayers.. in shaa Allah..

Infinity

Down to Earth
It's like I'm frozen, but the world still turns
Stuck in motion, and the wheels keep spinning 'round
Moving in reverse with no way out

How many nights does it take to count the stars?
That's the time it would take to fix my heart
Oh, baby, I was there for you
All I ever wanted was the truth, yeah, yeah

How many nights have you wished someone would stay?
Lie awake only hoping they're okay
I never counted all of mine
If I tried, I know it would feel like infinity
Infinity, infinity, yeah
Infinity

And now I'm one step closer to being two steps far from you
When everybody wants you

_______________________________________________

How many days I wished while lying there with you
That you would just stayed just a while longer
But my wish, only remains as a wish
You would just leave after

And how many times my heart broke into a million pieces
Seeing you walk away like nothing's happened
When reality is you really don't care
Like I do

Confettis and Samburu elephants inside my heart

The confetti part:

1- You asked me to come.

"Kalau boleh datang la esok..
  Sekejap pun jadi la"

You know I'd do anything for you syg

2- I get to see you. I get to do stuff for you. I get to hug you.
    And you whisper in my ear,

"Jangan tinggalkan saya.."

That is all that I needed. Nothing else matter anymore.
Kalau kena tipu then tipu lah..IDC.

The Samburu elephants part :

If you guys don't know what Samburu elephants are. here are the image from Google Street View.

Ok now, imagine the elephant, inside my heart.

Thats is how I felt when I'm leaving you. Wish I couldve stayed way longer.
To take care of you.
Uwaaa.. sedih..

Maybe I'm missing you

I MISS YOU SO MUCH

T__T

Mine & Your Fight Song

*Rachel Platten's Fight Song playing in my earphones*

This is my fight song
Take-back-my-life song
Proof-I'm Alright song

My power's turned on 
Right now I'll be strong
Cause you've still got a lot of fight left in you

Yup syg.. You still got a lot to fight for in your worldly life
For your loved ones
and I'm hoping
For me

Cause right now I'll proof that I'm alright
And you too need to be alright
For us

You are strong I know
But sometimes I can see you are weak as well
You cover that up pretty convincingly
You are scared and that's okay baby
Tell me whenever you are feeling afraid
I'll take your hand and hold you close to my heart
My hands in your hair, your face on my shoulder
Everything will be okay
In Shaa Allah

Saya rindu..
Sobs T__T

The Beginning of Our Temporary Goodbye

Lets just say that the last time we saw each other, it was magical... *insert fitting fireworks gif here*
Simply the best..

So, my nasihat is, you take care of yourself, eat healthy, drink loads of water, doa to Allah banyak2, and jangan mengelejat sangat boleh tak..

In Shaa Allah everything will go smoothly and I pray that you will get better very very soon because I cant stand being apart from you even for a minute.

Ingat sy selalu..

Bye
Assalamualaikum syg.